Best Dating Sites for 2023
We break down the pros and cons of the top dating sites and apps.
If you're looking to meet someone special, you'll find the dating scene has largely moved online. Dating sites and apps are the most popular way to do it these days. It's tough to beat the convenience of looking through potential matches at home, and they're certainly a lot more comfortable than approaching random people in the wild. And no matter what you're looking for, whether it's a long-term relationship or just some casual fun, you've got tons of different dating site options to choose from.
eHarmony was one of the pioneers among online dating site options, and -- while I haven't personally used this one -- we all remember the pitch for online daters, thanks to years of TV commercials: The service matches couples based on "29 dimensions" of compatibility and interests (as determined by a thorough relationship questionnaire and personality test). While you can review the profiles of your prospective matches for free, you'll need to pay to unlock the full features of the service. There's a three-month plan and a six-month plan, and they come with a guarantee: If, after three months of paid membership and communicating with at least five members, you're not satisfied, eHarmony will refund your money. Despite a rocky road that eventually involved a high-profile lawsuit, the site finally added same-sex dating in 2013. I have mixed feelings about using the site myself, but it's at least technically more inclusive now.
OkCupid, how you confuse me. I have friends who've met their ideal match and even spouses through OkCupid. My last serious relationship came from the OkCupid dating service. In fact, I've been on OkCupid on and off, for roughly the last 11 years. Profiles are a lot more in-depth than most online dating sites and if you answer a seemingly endless series of questions (much like a personality test), they will spit out a reasonable Match/Enemy percentage ratio on profiles to help you gauge compatibility based on interests.
Changes in the last few years have made OkCupid a bit more like Tinder (they're owned by the same company), focusing more on swiping and eliminating the ability to message a user without matching with them first. Online daters can still send a message -- it just won't show up in the recipient's inbox unless you match. Because who doesn't enjoy sending a thoughtful message to someone who might never see it? However, OkCupid has pointed out that these changes did help lower the number of offensive messages and fake profiles people received, which might be a worthwhile trade-off. Unfortunately in my experience OkCupid has
become a bit of a dating ghost town.
Most dating apps are fairly LGBTQ inclusive. Still, it's nice to have an app to call your own. Her is tailored to lesbian, bisexual and queer women. It's a worthy notion -- but the app has some bugs and glitches that made it frustrating to use. Most of my queer female friends have told me they found the app "just OK" and not perfect and that they usually end up back on Tinder or Bumble. Still I checked it regularly for some time and had a few pleasant conversations with actual human beings. Isn't that all we're really looking for in a dating app?
Clover tried to be the on-demand version of online dating sites, letting you order a date much like you would a pizza. It also provides numeric match predictions based on compatibility and interests, though it isn't entirely clear how those numbers are calculated.
I was on Clover for quite some time, but had since forgotten it existed until I started to compile this list. It strikes me as a less-successful hybrid of OkCupid and Tinder with a relatively small user base, even though I live in an urban area with plenty of people who use a wide variety of dating apps. Clover says it has nearly 6 million users, 85% of whom are between the ages of 18 and 30.
Coffee Meets Bagel hopes to offer people better-quality matches by sending curated daily matches, or "bagels," each day at noon. They suggest ice-breakers for first messages and the profiles are more in-depth than Tinder. For people who like a little extra hand-holding, CMB isn't the worst option. However, I found the app confusing to use, with too many features and a lot of gimmicks. I shouldn't have to look up online tutorials to figure out how to use a dating app. Plus why call matches Bagels?
I was also disappointed in the notifications, which I found too pushy. CMB was constantly "gently" reminding me to message people I'd matched with. I eventually disabled the app after receiving the following notification: "Show [match name] who's boss and break the ice today!" Should a potential future relationship be rooted in a hierarchical power dynamic? At the end of the day, I have friends who've had the perfect match on CMB, but it isn't one of my favorite online dating apps.
Plenty of Fish launched in 2003 -- and it shows. The problem I come across over and over again is that POF is filled with bots and scams, even though it may have the most users of any dating app. POF's issues don't mean you won't be able to find love on it, but the odds might be stacked against you. Unless you're into dating bots.
Match.com has a free version, but the general consensus is that you'll need a paid subscription to have any luck. That's a hangover from the early days of online dating sites, when a paid basic membership to a site meant you were serious about settling down. But my friends and I have long since come to the conclusion that you might be a little too eager to find a significant other or the perfect partner if you pay to get dates, particularly given the abundance of free dating apps. There are definitely paid features on some dating apps that are worth the price, but I've yet to be able to justify shelling out cash for love.
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